Ls Magazine Issue 05 Supple Babies ⚫

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Ls Magazine Issue 05 Supple Babies ⚫

Ls Magazine Issue 05 Supple Babies

Milwaukee resident Patty Valle, who herself was given up for adoption at age five, is now the director of the Wisconsin Adoption Children’s Alliance, which promotes adoption and works to educate the public.

“I have lived with the regret of those 16 years of my life with the child that I avoided for so long,” Maria Ciampa writes in her book, “The Adopted Child. As time goes on, I understand more and more reasons why I could not face my brother or my parents. My reasons have changed as I have gotten older, but the feelings are the same.”

Adoption leaves out some of the complexity — or the lucky circumstances — of birth families, of course. Parenting a child is not a one-way relationship, and some women and men who do adopt end up needing more support to raise their children. One recent analysis of adopted children and parents found that in families where the child was adopted, parents had high levels of relationship conflict and low levels of intimacy. Those conflicted parents were also more likely to divorce than those who had not adopted.

In fact, another recent study found that children who adopted have higher odds of experiencing mental illness than those who have biological siblings. It’s not clear what causes this, but researchers are working on it. One theory is that post-adoption distress makes children feel a greater sense of loss by not knowing their biological parents. But given the strong relationship between adoption and sibling discord, perhaps it’s the other way around.

By contrast, what do we make of high-order births, parents who clearly value their children, but who don’t know where their babies come from? One recent study found that children in high-order families had more health problems and engaged in more behavioral and emotional problems than other children. That is probably because high-order families encounter more parent-child conflict, researchers say, which is known to have detrimental impacts on child development.

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Ls Magazine Issue 05 Supple Babies ⚫

Ls Magazine Issue 05 Supple Babies ⚫

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